Ebjournal Revisited.

Serenity? Now? Finally?

I give up.

Friends, I’m about to tell you a quick true story that may illustrate a subtle shift in my personality.  While it may be a fluke of nature or a distortion in the space-time continuum, the following events transpired exactly as I am about to relate them to you.

After hauling my ever-so-slightly slimmed down self to the gym for a quick 60 minute workout today, I decided to cruise across my hamlet to the local Subway to grab dinner before settling in for a night of paper writing and grading. Along the way, I noticed the river being higher than I’ve ever seen in it the 20+ years I lived here and saw the efforts of a community coming together.  As I pulled into the Subway parking lot (also partially submerged) I checked my car stereo clock.  5:45.  Home by six, I thought.
I enter the store and see five people in front of me and only ONE sandwich artist behind the counter.  I took my place in line and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Gentle readers, you may not have run into me in awhile, or may have forgotten, but I am not the most patient person in the world.  With my students, sure, but that’s because they’re spastic and barely have control over their bowels, much less their mouths and impulses.  With grown-ups, I’ve been known to be a bit of ah, well, cranky jerkstore is a soft way of putting it.

I waited for 25 minutes at the Subway to get my sandwich.  You may be thinking that you could see my blood boiling, my neck turning red when I’m upset (watch for it next time, dead giveaway), and my eyes narrowed into slits the give the impression that I am truly the possessor of The Mighty Eye (see: Dakos, Kalli: poetry)

But here’s the thing: I wasn’t upset.  Not even close.  In fact, I was downright convivial with the lone slinger of sandwiches as she scurried to make me my oven roasted chicken breast on wheat.

So what the hell is wrong with me?  During my near half-hour of standing in the queue, I relaxed, did some breathing, and, I kid you not, thought about the things I was thankful for today.

And it felt good.

This is a trend I’ve noticed slowly overcoming me since the beginning of summer.  I’m now more content to take things at a measured pace.  I’m not always in a hurry to be somewhere (though if it involves football or consuming liquids… watch out) and in perhaps the most telling example of all- I Don’t Get To School At The Same Time Everyday.  For anyone that knows me, this is unheard of.  Is it a new leaf?  Is it a development of patience and rose-smelling?  Is it the slow realization that some things are out of my control and I can’t do anything about them so I might as well chill out?  NO ONE KNOWS.

I’ve been given some sort of serenity and I have no idea if it is permanent.  Spooky.
Stay tuned.

RSS Trackback URL 15. September 2008 (18:02)
Filed under: General, WTF?, All about me, In the Reflecting Pool